Today I miss you

On December 28, 2008 my Aunt Carroll was called home.  She had been battling numerous health issues and finally that day her body decided she had fought long and hard enough.  It finally let her go somewhere she could be healthy and happy again.  Recently for some reason I can't stop thinking about her.  I believe in Heaven but to be honest I can't really imagine what it is like.  Is there a reason I can't stop thinking about her lately?  Is it because she is up in Heaven thinking of me? Or is it because with every day I watch my children grow I know life is so extremely short and she missed seeing all of this?  I have no answers but sadness that she isn't around to see my kids grow up.  She isn't around to go on crazy shopping trips with my Mom.  I miss her because she would always have some incredible way of putting my Dad in his place at family gatherings and he would actually listen.  Her death made such an impact on our family but no one talks about it much.  I also miss being able to sit around the table and talk about wines with her.  I just miss her and that hole will never be filled.  Death is always so much more painful for the living.  For the ones left behind to have to get past this and keep on living. 
I hope there is a Heaven and that all we have been taught and told does exist.  I hope we all get to go there and we do get that special reunion we have all been told and taught.  I really hope it exists.  I hope I see my Grandparents and the ones I never got to meet.  I hope I get to see my niece who was just to precious for this world to be dancing around and laughing with her bouncy curly brown hair. I guess all we can do is just close our eyes and imagine what Heaven would be like and just realize how precious life is. Deaths greatest gift is to remind us to live life to the fullest.  I believe death allows us to live and love that much more.  Death reminds us how quickly things can change and to not have any regrets because there is no reset button for life.  We only get one shot.  Death is part of living. 
Here is a great song that reminds us Heaven got another Angel . 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-hASQH9EfQA&feature=g-like&context=G207aca4ALTyDT0gAHAA

To all who we have lost, you are gone but never forgotten.